Eye Contact, Not Eye Contacts

Two guys about to get into a scrap, a pair of strangers across a room, a victim praying for mercy from their perpetrator; all of these situations reach a certain apex when it happens: eye contact. What is it about the human condition that makes eye contact so powerful. We can all argue that a tight...whatever you prefer being tight, on a person can attract us to them, but when we make eye contact things reach a whole new level.

In some ways I could be overstating the power of eye contact, but I have come to realize firsthand that no one can ignore you if you hold their gaze. If you need to break a language barrier, make eye contact and the receiver will listen to you regardless of whether they understand you or not (the language thing is your problem though). In my work I have to talk to a lot of strangers, strange being the operative idea here. At first it was frustrating because they wouldn't listen and put themselves and others in danger. After a while though I noticed that forcing eye contact with them before explaining the situation would really get their attention and most times they would listen to me.

The flip side is that sometimes making eye contact is the worst possible thing you could do. If the person is already aggressive making eye contact with them will make you their new target of aggression; like a game of "Tag, You're Dead". It's impossible to know with some people what they are feeling inside, so eye contact is a bit like Russian Roulette, you just have to hope they're not loaded.


Learning to make eye contact can be intimidating, but it's, for good or bad, an effective way to get noticed. People respond to you, remember you and a connection is made. Just a word of warning though, don't make eye contact for too long, it just might make you seem over-confident and slightly creepy.


Talk about creepy, I share this with you.

PS: Apologies if I miss a day or two, I'll make it up to you guys. :)